Save Me…… from “towing” the line when it comes to parking rules

I saw something very unusual this week. Unusual, that is, for the streets of Seville. It´s something I´ve only encountered once before around here and that time I was on the receiving end of it. In the streets of London it´s by no means an unusual sight at all. In fact, if you go through a day without seeing one in London then something is wrong.

I talk, of course, of a clamper and tow truck. The one that cheerfully takes your car away when it´s parked illegally. In London, there´s hardly enough room for cars any more because when the roads aren´t filled with buses and taxis, they´re filled with tow trucks, jamming yellow clamps on any vehicle so much as a millimeter outside its parking space.

But here in Seville it´s such an unusual sight that it actually drew a crowd of people.

We were sitting in a cafe having breakfast on Wednesday when, first, a police car turned up and then, minutes later, the tow truck. They were coming to remove two cars that had parked in a designated loading bay outside the supermarket just down the road from our flat.

I would have said the people who parked them did it mistakenly, having not seen the sign that said not to park there between such-and-such an hour each day, just as I did last year in Jerez (hence me being on the receiving end of it). It was a mistake and I paid the price.

But I would put money on the fact that their parking wasn´t a mistake this time. Why? Because the drivers were both Spanish. And when it comes to rules, by and large the Spanish ignore them. They feel they are a burden, an irritation, an unnecessary obstruction to their ability to do what they want, when they want and how they want.

In Spain, when it comes to rules, the general rule is that there aren´t any rules.

As if to prove my point, no sooner had the tow truck (two of them, in fact. It was a bonanza day as far as tow trucks go) had removed the offending vehicles and the police had finished walking around trying to look menacing in their dark glasses and holstered guns, then two more cars came along and promptly filled the empty spaces again. The drivers wandered off, oblivious to the impending doom that awaited their cars.

But here´s the thing. The reason why people ignore the rules, and why the next two drivers parked up seemingly unconcerned about the fate of their cars, was for a very good reason. It´s because the vast majority of the time nobody enforces the bloody rules.

That’s what I meant when I said I was so surprised to see a tow truck.

Seville is a vibrant, busy metropolis of activity. The shops are busy, the streets bustling with people and the cafes and bars are filled. Shops have little signs on their windows saying when they open and close. But you learn to ignore them because most of the time the shops will open when the staff feel like it.

The same concept goes for parking. There are signs saying where to park. But people park anywhere and everywhere. And each time they park, they have one objective in mind. How can I get to the place I want to get to and do what I want to do in the quickest possible time? Oh, and how can I do all that and cause the maximum amount of disruption to everybody else, while they´re all trying to do exactly the same thing at the same time?

I´ve seen people park on roundabouts in between exits. I´ve seen people park right across pedestrian crossings (presumably wheelchair users trying to use the dropped kerb are expected to get a good run-up and jump over the car instead). I´ve seen people park on pavements, not just half on and half off the pavement but right slap-bang in the middle of a pavement. I´ve seen people park at traffic lights. Really. You might be driving along, minding your own business, you pull up behind a car waiting at the traffic lights. Then just as the lights turn green, the driver in front of you opens the door, gets out and buggers off. You´re sitting there trapped right behind him while all the other cars behind are then all honking their horns like mad at you because you´re the one who´s not moving!

And why do people do these things? Because they know nobody is going to do anything about it. I´ve even seen bloody police cars park on pavements just so the policemen don´t have to walk an extra few yards to buy a bloody ice cream from the newsagents.

Then, of course, there is double parking. I´ve left this out of list above because it happens so often that it has become socially acceptable to do it now. If you come back to your car and find yourself blocked in, you just sit on the horn until the offender turns up ten minutes later shrugging his shoulders and saying “I was only gone for two minutes. What are you making a fuss for?”

It´s also quite normal for cars in Spain to have dents, scratches, bumps and scrapes. In fact, if you find one that hasn´t got a load of markings on it, you´d probably be inclined to instinctively give it one with your key or your boot.

You see, that´s the difference here. In the UK, especially in the big cities, if you park wrongly you can expect the clampers and tow trucks to descend on you like balaclava-wearing SAS soldiers crashing through your windows carrying stun grenades and machine guns. But here, people just shrug their shoulders.

Here, it´s socially acceptable to lean against a strangers´ car if you’re standing on the street talking to someone. In the UK, try it and you´ll get swift retribution from the car owner.

Here, cars have scratches and dents and nobody cares. In the UK, if you give another car so much as the lightest of pings you´ll leave the owner facing either a heart attack or a murder charge.

Sounds better here? Well, maybe. But the problem is the inconsistency. Most of the time nobody gives a damn about the rules.

But sometimes they do. You just never know when it´s going to happen. Makes it all quite exciting in a way.